[yea jiji would just carry tsuru straight to shinobu and that'd be the most he'd manage
but he pauses at that before he lets himself lean forward as though to claim a kiss - but first he murmurs against tsuru's lips]
I think your heart more open than that, my crane.
[before letting the space between them close.
tsurumaru often appears as fine - mikazuki knows this well. exasperation and stubbornness tend to appear hand in hand on his expression, but there is so rarely an acknowledgement of what his heart must feel. it is a consistent thing.
but they cannot both be the types to shoulder all on their own]
[ he gives him a second kiss, and then another, and pulls away only so he can actually grab the clothing to help change mikazuki into.
there is a level of vulnerability here that he's not sure what to do about, since mikazuki is tipping it towards tsuru's direction instead of his own. it's a little frustrating, the way he turns where the spotlight points to. ]
So right now, I am fine, other than my worry for you.
[ god he just. laughs. and then returns to finishing his work. once the yukata is properly fastened, tsurumaru takes a step back to make sure it covers everything properly.
with the distance between them, he speaks again. ]
I am rather good at taking care of myself, you know. [ ... ] But that doesn't mean I don't want someone by my side through it. I can be alone, but I don't want to be lonely.
mikazuki reaches out. slowly, because his shoulder's so fucked up, but he will cup tsuru's face again and draw him closer. he can't pull away or he'll fuck up jiji's injuries it's very cruel for him to choose this as a tactic.
but he does.
because sometimes mikazuki is cruel, even when he cares.]
Eternity itself will never be enough time to spend by your side.
[for once, mikazuki thinks forever is something that he could want rather than dread.]
But if I wanted to take care of you - would you let me?
You're really asking me this when you are this injured.
[ there's so much disbelief in his tone.
but he closes his eyes, allowing himself to focus on the sensation of mikazuki's hand against his skin. how he wants to have moments like these whenever he can, because he never wants to be without him. because when mikazuki munechika is gone, there is simply a void that's left in the space he once occupied.
he opens his eyes. ]
I don't know how it's possible to care about you as deeply as I do.
It is because I am so injured. [he smiles knowingly] It is the privilege of the wounded to feel their physical aches while others suffer their emotional scars.
[tsuru would be the same way, he's pretty sure. tired laughter, a comment on red looking beautiful upon a crane, the like. wounds upon these bodies don't actually mean much to the ones wearing them.
softly, after a moment:] .... I know not why you love me.
I never will. My heart should feel as familiar to your palm as your blade.
[ and like his blade, if he squeezes it too tightly in the wrong spot, it will draw blood.
he shifts, turning his head just enough to press a kiss to mikazuki's hand. to the callousness that line it, that no amount of careful maintenance can hide when you're a swordsman. ]
[ . . . it is a funny thing - to know the vulnerability and care inherent in giving your heart to another. to give that person a power over you - that they could unmake you with but an action or word.
it is funnier still, to know that sometimes that is still different than trusting someone with all of you.
perhaps their love is just a bit strange, that way.]
[ he leans in, pressing their lips together again and lingering in it.
there's still a lot he wants to ask. about what else happened on that trip, and how mikazuki is feeling about it. but he'll let this moment last a little longer first. ]
[yea jiji literally would've felt guilty only if he made tsuru curfew by himself in the hallway.
but he will let his right hand run through tsuru's hair once before his fingers follow the path down the side of his face, then to his chin]
... then stay with me.
[jiji doesn't really want to risk anyone else's safety when he doesn't trust himself, because he doesn't think they entirely know what he's capable of.
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but he pauses at that before he lets himself lean forward as though to claim a kiss - but first he murmurs against tsuru's lips]
I think your heart more open than that, my crane.
[before letting the space between them close.
tsurumaru often appears as fine - mikazuki knows this well. exasperation and stubbornness tend to appear hand in hand on his expression, but there is so rarely an acknowledgement of what his heart must feel. it is a consistent thing.
but they cannot both be the types to shoulder all on their own]
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[ he gives him a second kiss, and then another, and pulls away only so he can actually grab the clothing to help change mikazuki into.
there is a level of vulnerability here that he's not sure what to do about, since mikazuki is tipping it towards tsuru's direction instead of his own. it's a little frustrating, the way he turns where the spotlight points to. ]
So right now, I am fine, other than my worry for you.
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[it is an admission - of both mikazuki's time as lune, and perhaps about his own feelings as a sword warrior in the course of history.
but even as he lets tsurumaru help him, moves slowly enough as to not aggravate his wounds further, that he can't help his curiosity.
just as tsurumaru had asked him before - ]
If you are always worrying after others, who is worrying after you?
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Claude.
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with the distance between them, he speaks again. ]
I am rather good at taking care of myself, you know. [ ... ] But that doesn't mean I don't want someone by my side through it. I can be alone, but I don't want to be lonely.
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mikazuki reaches out. slowly, because his shoulder's so fucked up, but he will cup tsuru's face again and draw him closer. he can't pull away or he'll fuck up jiji's injuries it's very cruel for him to choose this as a tactic.
but he does.
because sometimes mikazuki is cruel, even when he cares.]
Eternity itself will never be enough time to spend by your side.
[for once, mikazuki thinks forever is something that he could want rather than dread.]
But if I wanted to take care of you - would you let me?
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[ there's so much disbelief in his tone.
but he closes his eyes, allowing himself to focus on the sensation of mikazuki's hand against his skin. how he wants to have moments like these whenever he can, because he never wants to be without him. because when mikazuki munechika is gone, there is simply a void that's left in the space he once occupied.
he opens his eyes. ]
I don't know how it's possible to care about you as deeply as I do.
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[tsuru would be the same way, he's pretty sure. tired laughter, a comment on red looking beautiful upon a crane, the like. wounds upon these bodies don't actually mean much to the ones wearing them.
softly, after a moment:] .... I know not why you love me.
But I would like it, if you did not stop.
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[ and like his blade, if he squeezes it too tightly in the wrong spot, it will draw blood.
he shifts, turning his head just enough to press a kiss to mikazuki's hand. to the callousness that line it, that no amount of careful maintenance can hide when you're a swordsman. ]
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it is funnier still, to know that sometimes that is still different than trusting someone with all of you.
perhaps their love is just a bit strange, that way.]
I will handle it with care.
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[ he leans in, pressing their lips together again and lingering in it.
there's still a lot he wants to ask. about what else happened on that trip, and how mikazuki is feeling about it. but he'll let this moment last a little longer first. ]
Where are we staying tonight?
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.... I believe I will make myself available in the courtyard for a time, but I shall be spending the night in this room.
[normally he's happy to tag along wherever for curfew but when he's still feeling Off, he'll keep to himself]
So I suppose you shall also be spending the night in this room, if it is agreeable to you.
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[ even if mikazuki locked him out, tsuru would simply sleep outside his door out of stubbornness. ]
It'll be very hard to be rid of me.
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but he will let his right hand run through tsuru's hair once before his fingers follow the path down the side of his face, then to his chin]
... then stay with me.
[jiji doesn't really want to risk anyone else's safety when he doesn't trust himself, because he doesn't think they entirely know what he's capable of.
but he trusts tsuru does]
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The moment you start to feel like yourself again, you must go to get healed. I cannot risk you having this large of an injury indefinitely.
[ even the great mikazuki munechika can be slowed by something like this. ]
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but mikazuki will just laugh faintly at that.]
... I suppose then, if my crane decides that I 'must'....
[what else is left for him to do?]