sylvain's countenance immediately shifts to something... almost closed off. but there's misery in his eyes. (i'm sorry for his nonstop manpain) ]
I... I'll begin with saying that I don't remember anything on Thursday after curfew, other than all of us falling asleep in the karaoke lounge and waking up in the same place.
[ he closes his eyes. there's a long pause, before he continues. ]
However, I do remember the rest of the week. I ordered room service from Aquarius on Monday. ...You should all know that 'Thank You for the Venom' leaves a purple lip mark on the victim.
[ in case it ever turns up in trial in the future. he also shows his room key to the four of them—one star still lit. ]
I'm not sure if there's any good way to find out whether I've already used it or not [ well... other than maybe asking an npc, which he'll try once i get my life in order ], but the fact remains it isn't something I would purchase in self-defense. And that the other culprit was never found during trial.
[ his jaw tenses ]
There's more I remember from earlier in the week, too.
[ he looks like he's about to tell them, but he stops and simply finishes with ]
as sylvain speaks, he continues to sip upon this cup of tea, thoughtful and expression neutral. eventually, a smile spreads across his lips even as his eyes remain closed. it is not a joyful smile, but a thoughtful one.]
... I made a promise to one no longer with us, and I intend to keep it. [a beat] But I wonder again - how was it that we came to the conclusion that two shadows might be in our midst?
[anyway he'll leave it at that.
his eyes open afterward, and his gaze falls upon sylvain. the crescents in his pupils flash, and he brings a hand up to sylvain's chin, forcing him to face him.]
... you will say what else you recall. [in a tone with little room for argument] For all others possessed by shadow retain their memories, to the point that it prevents them from confessing even in the midst of trial.
But I advise you not breathe a word of this to any other, just as I will not.
I do not pass judgment upon you.
[grandpa will keep your secret because otherwise the chasmas and 7rs are gonna come for your ass, honey]
[ sylvain nods ] You're the only ones who can know.
[ or he can get mcmurdered off schedule/midtrialed, it's fine. sylvain may wind up dead W5 anyway! I WELCOME DEATH
anyway i can't believe he has to say this while staring gayly at jiji, tsurumaru is right there? dimitri and shinobu also? forget the other factions he's not making it out of this meeting alive ]
I remember purchasing a sword from the gift shop on Wednesday. So I should've had three tickets.
[ pretend he explained the math verbally: +5 from W3 (i got audited help) +1 from W4 -1 for sword -2 for furby ]
But I had four tickets during trial. And now I'm back to three again.
[WHY IS HE STARING GAYLY? MIKAZUKI IS TRULY TO MAKE SURE HE'S NOT LYING OR GETTING A BRAINFOG OF BAD MEMORIES? please fall in love with jason again,
anyway.]
.... you had a fabricated ticket? An illusion? Was it present for all of trial, and not simply an hour?
For what reason did you choose a sword, when you are adept in lances and axes?
And when did you come to the decision that you would tell us? Did you feel inclined to do so before trial, but found yourself stopped, or did it only arise after trial's end?
No, that wasn't it. I only ordered room service once. And I had three tickets before curfew as well. Everyone's tickets were accounted for in the karaoke room, so I didn't take any of yours to cover for the deficit. [ here my cat stepped on my keyboard and typed wsssssssaaaZA ]
I imagine it would be to deflect attention from me. There've been so many cases involving swords already, why would anyone suspect this to be different? I don't think I would've wanted to frame anyone specifically [ SEEING EVERYONE HERE USES SWORDS HELLO ] but to waste time by misdirecting suspicion.
...No, this was all after the trial. I needed some time to think things through, figure out what might've happened and why I acted the way I did this week.
[ unfortunately, it isn't a good conclusion for anyone. ]
[sometimes you just want to take a clear look into someone's soul]
So for trial alone, you suddenly had a ticket that would be able to cover your expense and divert any attention from you... is it?
[that's terrible, and doesn't bode well for their understanding of future cases]
... and even now, after execution, you possess no memory of what you had done on Thursday. [mikazuki's hand drifts from sylvain's chin, coming to rest at his neck. his thumb against his throat, applying just enough pressure for sylvain to know it's there, but not to constrict his airways. yet.] Including why the graves of the departed were disturbed to hide your evidence.
No, I don't think that's it. I'm thinking I must've stolen Kaeya's ticket, but it's no longer in my possession.
[ it takes all of sylvain's power not to flinch away from mikazuki. something flashes across his eyes—it's only for an instant and easy to miss, but it's wild and fearful. like he's looking at someone else.
it passes. his voice doesn't waver when he speaks, though his expression crumples a little. ]
I don't remember visiting the cemetery Thursday. But that must have been my work, to cover my tracks, and for that I'm genuinely sorry.
it would answer another question, about where kaeya's ticket had gone. diluc had mentioned it missing, but no search for it in his room commenced. mikazuki stares at sylvain for another long moment, and his expression and hold on him do not shift even when sylvain's stutters and crumbles.
for a moment, he is every bit an ancient and cold blade. it is right to possess some margin of fear.]
[but mikazuki is, ultimately, a friend to those with tragic roles to play.
the hunt for sylvain's head will commence the moment others find out, and there is something disgraceful indeed about hiding evidence even amongst those gone. but there is a net benefit to knowing that some of their bodies have already disappeared, and what remains at the core of all this is that a shadow overtook him.
what compulsions were his own, and what were the actions of the shadow... it is worth considering, but it is not enough to outweigh mikazuki's empathy.
he will lift his thumb from sylvain's throat after only briefly brushing over his pulse point, and curl his fingers around the back of his neck, guiding him downward - only so it is easier for mikazuki to press his lips against his forehead]
Apologize when they return. It is not I who has the ability to absolve you of your guilt, even if I shall hear and acknowledge it.
... but I know the pain of cutting down those you love, when your mind is not your own. To speak words of venom you do not mean, and puppeted to cause destruction you would not otherwise act upon. To believe death is not punishment enough, but knowing you cannot die yet.
[ she has to school her expression so neatly, so completely. her smile is place and still on her face. shadows are a bane that needs to be banished, but it does not make it any easier for her swallow this information.
softly: ]
.... You are already suspected by some others.
[ It's a warning as much as an observation. ]
If those from the station and Kaeya-san's previous round find out, I worry for your safety.
[ she takes a moment to think over what she wants to say before she holds out a hand to him, palm up. ]
Everyone else here knows this, but I was tasked to kill at the camp. I wasn't possessed by a shadow or anything else like you were, so I know the kind of guilt that comes with it.
[ ... ]
You're not alone. I want everyone here to survive, too, but don't you think Dimitri, whose survival you want the most, would want you to survive, too?
Thank you for how the information about how the room service works. Do you know if it can be used during trial?
[ can he refuse her? he places his hand over hers, and it may not be entirely steady. but he listens to her words carefully. ]
...To buy time for everyone else, yes? I saw a little bit of the camp from Dimitri's memories.
[ ... ]
Thank you, Shinobu. [ he looks like he isn't sure what dimitri will make of the matter, but also dimitri is right there even if nu is mobile, so he doesn't say anything else. ]
I hadn't asked that, but I can try confirming. [ adds to audience tdl ]
[ he could refuse this one. she wants to tell him he's not the only murder game murderer in this club, but she took a life without any influence. it was all her. ]
It doesn't make what I did any better or any good, but it means I'd have very little room to judge you.
[ although she does judge him for some of the things he's done at his worst. grave digging is a really bad look. he could have buried his evidence someplace else.
she's fairly confident dimitri won't cut sylvain off. he is not going to take this with grace (probably), but he knows the system in place. ]
It's something I think would be good to know, just in case.
unlike the others, he doesn't really try to keep his expression neutral. his eyes widen for a second, and the corner of his mouth twitches like it's fighting the urge to smile-- he really does love surprises, and this sure is a big one.
yet, it's not a happy smile. ]
I am grateful that you trusted us enough to share.
[ mikazuki already did the "you do NOT share this again" speech because they are truly gonna beat your ass
I don't think you would have told me if it wasn't for our present company.
[ he glances between dimitri and mikazuki. ]
So, I still appreciate being told. I cannot say I particularly blame you for anything, since it's not your fault the shadows compelled you. It's just... unfortunate. How the last few days went.
[ he nods ] I probably wouldn't have. But ultimately I trust each of you to keep Dimitri safe. I know you've been together in this longer than I have. ...I'm sorry to be selfish when this was my fault in the first place.
[ he looks a little surprised, but his expression softens ]
Thank you, Tsurumaru. I'm not asking anyone here to cover for me, if it comes down to it. I'll accept whatever comes my way.
[ For the first part of this exposition, he looks faintly proud of Sylvain for putting his brain to good use—he's always been confident in his capabilities.
For the second half, he stares at him, wishing distantly that he could kill him and himself on the spot. ]
Sylvain...
[ He rubs his brow, closing his eyes for a long time. His voice crackles when he finds it, torn. ]
I—...I'm sorry. I know you cared for him a great deal—I saw your pain on Friday. Taking the life of a loved one is an abominable feeling. [ After experiencing three murder games and regaining memories from a fourth, he gets it. Sylvain is both his friend and his retainer, and he does ache for him. Still, his voice turns to steel. ] But we will make right as much as we can. I expect that much of you, because we know that if I speak of this someone will seek retribution.
[ Which is deserved and inevitable, to him, but... giving the hotel what it wants is off the table. ]
[ sylvain waits patiently for his verdict, and he looks visibly relieved to hear it. because if there's anyone's forgiveness he really needs, or at the very least acceptance—it's dimitri's. he's the closest tie he has here. he is his home.
he agrees without hesitation. ]
Of course. I'll die if I have to. But before then, I'll use whatever time I have to fix what I can.
[ He isn't going to reject him. It isn't his place to grant forgiveness—that's on Kaeya and the others—but he is Sylvain's king and friend both. He will accept him until the bitter end.
But even then, shade or not, they have to do something about this. He reaches out to grip Sylvain's arms, squeezing tightly, making no effort to train back his strength this time. ]
No. You will not resign yourself to death. I will allow you to live with guilt and suffer atonement, but you will not seek death as your recourse.
[ It's not allowed. ]
...If possible, I believe we need to warn people that some may not remember the course of Thursday nights.
[ dimitri's grip is bruising, but sylvain doesn't try to break free. ]
I know. I'm not trying to take the easy way out, believe me.
[ just that he isn't going to let any fear of retribution keep him from moving forward. (he doesn't fear it, is the thing.) and he hopes dimitri will remember those words as well. ]
I agree. We can try leaving another anonymous note in the lobby.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
(2/2)
sylvain's countenance immediately shifts to something... almost closed off. but there's misery in his eyes. (i'm sorry for his nonstop manpain) ]
I... I'll begin with saying that I don't remember anything on Thursday after curfew, other than all of us falling asleep in the karaoke lounge and waking up in the same place.
[ he closes his eyes. there's a long pause, before he continues. ]
However, I do remember the rest of the week. I ordered room service from Aquarius on Monday. ...You should all know that 'Thank You for the Venom' leaves a purple lip mark on the victim.
[ in case it ever turns up in trial in the future. he also shows his room key to the four of them—one star still lit. ]
I'm not sure if there's any good way to find out whether I've already used it or not [ well... other than maybe asking an npc, which he'll try once i get my life in order ], but the fact remains it isn't something I would purchase in self-defense. And that the other culprit was never found during trial.
[ his jaw tenses ]
There's more I remember from earlier in the week, too.
[ he looks like he's about to tell them, but he stops and simply finishes with ]
...I think I was behind Kaeya's death.
no subject
as sylvain speaks, he continues to sip upon this cup of tea, thoughtful and expression neutral. eventually, a smile spreads across his lips even as his eyes remain closed. it is not a joyful smile, but a thoughtful one.]
... I made a promise to one no longer with us, and I intend to keep it. [a beat] But I wonder again - how was it that we came to the conclusion that two shadows might be in our midst?
[anyway he'll leave it at that.
his eyes open afterward, and his gaze falls upon sylvain. the crescents in his pupils flash, and he brings a hand up to sylvain's chin, forcing him to face him.]
... you will say what else you recall. [in a tone with little room for argument] For all others possessed by shadow retain their memories, to the point that it prevents them from confessing even in the midst of trial.
But I advise you not breathe a word of this to any other, just as I will not.
I do not pass judgment upon you.
[grandpa will keep your secret because otherwise the chasmas and 7rs are gonna come for your ass, honey]
no subject
[ or he can get mcmurdered off schedule/midtrialed, it's fine. sylvain may wind up dead W5 anyway! I WELCOME DEATH
anyway i can't believe he has to say this while staring gayly at jiji, tsurumaru is right there? dimitri and shinobu also? forget the other factions he's not making it out of this meeting alive ]
I remember purchasing a sword from the gift shop on Wednesday. So I should've had three tickets.
[ pretend he explained the math verbally:
+5 from W3 (i got audited help)
+1 from W4
-1 for sword
-2 for furby ]
But I had four tickets during trial. And now I'm back to three again.
no subject
anyway.]
.... you had a fabricated ticket? An illusion? Was it present for all of trial, and not simply an hour?
For what reason did you choose a sword, when you are adept in lances and axes?
And when did you come to the decision that you would tell us? Did you feel inclined to do so before trial, but found yourself stopped, or did it only arise after trial's end?
no subject
No, that wasn't it. I only ordered room service once. And I had three tickets before curfew as well. Everyone's tickets were accounted for in the karaoke room, so I didn't take any of yours to cover for the deficit. [ here my cat stepped on my keyboard and typed wsssssssaaaZA ]
I imagine it would be to deflect attention from me. There've been so many cases involving swords already, why would anyone suspect this to be different? I don't think I would've wanted to frame anyone specifically [ SEEING EVERYONE HERE USES SWORDS HELLO ] but to waste time by misdirecting suspicion.
...No, this was all after the trial. I needed some time to think things through, figure out what might've happened and why I acted the way I did this week.
[ unfortunately, it isn't a good conclusion for anyone. ]
no subject
So for trial alone, you suddenly had a ticket that would be able to cover your expense and divert any attention from you... is it?
[that's terrible, and doesn't bode well for their understanding of future cases]
... and even now, after execution, you possess no memory of what you had done on Thursday. [mikazuki's hand drifts from sylvain's chin, coming to rest at his neck. his thumb against his throat, applying just enough pressure for sylvain to know it's there, but not to constrict his airways. yet.] Including why the graves of the departed were disturbed to hide your evidence.
[so terribly, carefully neutral.]
no subject
[ it takes all of sylvain's power not to flinch away from mikazuki. something flashes across his eyes—it's only for an instant and easy to miss, but it's wild and fearful. like he's looking at someone else.
it passes. his voice doesn't waver when he speaks, though his expression crumples a little. ]
I don't remember visiting the cemetery Thursday. But that must have been my work, to cover my tracks, and for that I'm genuinely sorry.
[1/2]
it would answer another question, about where kaeya's ticket had gone. diluc had mentioned it missing, but no search for it in his room commenced. mikazuki stares at sylvain for another long moment, and his expression and hold on him do not shift even when sylvain's stutters and crumbles.
for a moment, he is every bit an ancient and cold blade. it is right to possess some margin of fear.]
no subject
the hunt for sylvain's head will commence the moment others find out, and there is something disgraceful indeed about hiding evidence even amongst those gone. but there is a net benefit to knowing that some of their bodies have already disappeared, and what remains at the core of all this is that a shadow overtook him.
what compulsions were his own, and what were the actions of the shadow... it is worth considering, but it is not enough to outweigh mikazuki's empathy.
he will lift his thumb from sylvain's throat after only briefly brushing over his pulse point, and curl his fingers around the back of his neck, guiding him downward - only so it is easier for mikazuki to press his lips against his forehead]
Apologize when they return. It is not I who has the ability to absolve you of your guilt, even if I shall hear and acknowledge it.
... but I know the pain of cutting down those you love, when your mind is not your own. To speak words of venom you do not mean, and puppeted to cause destruction you would not otherwise act upon. To believe death is not punishment enough, but knowing you cannot die yet.
I shall not leave you to this feeling alone.
(no subject)
no subject
softly: ]
.... You are already suspected by some others.
[ It's a warning as much as an observation. ]
If those from the station and Kaeya-san's previous round find out, I worry for your safety.
[ she'll just come out and say it. ]
What do you want to happen, Sylvain-san?
no subject
I'll be fine. Whether it means living, or dying, I've accepted it.
[ he just murdered someone he deeply cared for, so! he's dead inside.
he's quiet for a moment, before answering, ]
I want Dimitri to survive, no matter what. All of you. So if there's any information I know that might help whatsoever, I'll offer it freely.
[ right. ] Which reminds me—for the poison, it takes about 10 minutes to fully go into effect.
no subject
Everyone else here knows this, but I was tasked to kill at the camp. I wasn't possessed by a shadow or anything else like you were, so I know the kind of guilt that comes with it.
[ ... ]
You're not alone. I want everyone here to survive, too, but don't you think Dimitri, whose survival you want the most, would want you to survive, too?
Thank you for how the information about how the room service works. Do you know if it can be used during trial?
no subject
...To buy time for everyone else, yes? I saw a little bit of the camp from Dimitri's memories.
[ ... ]
Thank you, Shinobu. [ he looks like he isn't sure what dimitri will make of the matter, but also dimitri is right there even if nu is mobile, so he doesn't say anything else. ]
I hadn't asked that, but I can try confirming. [ adds to audience tdl ]
no subject
It doesn't make what I did any better or any good, but it means I'd have very little room to judge you.
[ although she does judge him for some of the things he's done at his worst. grave digging is a really bad look. he could have buried his evidence someplace else.
she's fairly confident dimitri won't cut sylvain off. he is not going to take this with grace (probably), but he knows the system in place. ]
It's something I think would be good to know, just in case.
no subject
I'll see what I can find out. I've already tried asking about the missing bodies last night.
[ before he fully realized... what had happened... ]
The staff member I spoke to claimed they didn't know anymore than we did. That the hotel has 'strange whims' and we shouldn't think too much of it.
They weren't at liberty to disclose anything further.
(no subject)
no subject
unlike the others, he doesn't really try to keep his expression neutral. his eyes widen for a second, and the corner of his mouth twitches like it's fighting the urge to smile-- he really does love surprises, and this sure is a big one.
yet, it's not a happy smile. ]
I am grateful that you trusted us enough to share.
[ mikazuki already did the "you do NOT share this again" speech because they are truly gonna beat your ass
he doesn't add anything else though. ]
no subject
sylvain smiles too, and it's not happy, either. ]
I'm not sure I've done anything to earn gratitude, much less trust in return. But I hope you'll at least take this information in good faith.
no subject
[ he glances between dimitri and mikazuki. ]
So, I still appreciate being told. I cannot say I particularly blame you for anything, since it's not your fault the shadows compelled you. It's just... unfortunate. How the last few days went.
no subject
[ he looks a little surprised, but his expression softens ]
Thank you, Tsurumaru. I'm not asking anyone here to cover for me, if it comes down to it. I'll accept whatever comes my way.
no subject
I believe we will keep your secret, at the very least. But obscuring anything pointing to you... that wouldn't be wise.
[ it's one thing to say they don't know who killed kaeya, it's another to actively sabotage people trying to find out. ]
But you'll work really hard, right?
no subject
[ this is his mess, so it's on him to fix it, not make things worse. ]
I will.
[ even if he didn't want to, dimitri would make sure of it ]
(no subject)
no subject
For the second half, he stares at him, wishing distantly that he could kill him and himself on the spot. ]
Sylvain...
[ He rubs his brow, closing his eyes for a long time. His voice crackles when he finds it, torn. ]
I—...I'm sorry. I know you cared for him a great deal—I saw your pain on Friday. Taking the life of a loved one is an abominable feeling. [ After experiencing three murder games and regaining memories from a fourth, he gets it. Sylvain is both his friend and his retainer, and he does ache for him. Still, his voice turns to steel. ] But we will make right as much as we can. I expect that much of you, because we know that if I speak of this someone will seek retribution.
[ Which is deserved and inevitable, to him, but... giving the hotel what it wants is off the table. ]
no subject
he agrees without hesitation. ]
Of course. I'll die if I have to. But before then, I'll use whatever time I have to fix what I can.
no subject
But even then, shade or not, they have to do something about this. He reaches out to grip Sylvain's arms, squeezing tightly, making no effort to train back his strength this time. ]
No. You will not resign yourself to death. I will allow you to live with guilt and suffer atonement, but you will not seek death as your recourse.
[ It's not allowed. ]
...If possible, I believe we need to warn people that some may not remember the course of Thursday nights.
no subject
I know. I'm not trying to take the easy way out, believe me.
[ just that he isn't going to let any fear of retribution keep him from moving forward. (he doesn't fear it, is the thing.) and he hopes dimitri will remember those words as well. ]
I agree. We can try leaving another anonymous note in the lobby.